Parenting and Prevention

Parenting Through Challenges and Practical Solutions: Picky Eaters

By: Nella Vera and Kelly Benford

Have you ever made your child’s favorite dinner, only to be told they don’t like it anymore? Have you ever gone to a family member’s home for a meal and your child refused to eat what was served? Have you ever bought a lifelong supply of pretzels at Sam’s Club, their favorite, but the next day they don’t like them anymore?  It happens to all of us! The best part is that your child isn’t “broken” and you didn’t break them!

It is common to have a child who only likes to eat certain foods and is not interested in others, especially if they are new to them. These children are labeled “picky eaters.” For example, your child may love to eat pasta or bread, but when you try to give them vegetables or meat, they refuse to eat them. It can also happen that a child who previously ate everything suddenly becomes more demanding and only wants a few foods.

This type of behavior in children is typical and usually changes as they grow. Please, don’t worry too much. Over time, many children begin to explore and like new foods. Parents must be patient and continue offering them different foods, even if they initially do not accept them. Remember that each child is unique and grows at their own pace.

Why Children Are Picky Eaters

Understanding why some children are picky eaters is essential in addressing this behavior. Multiple reasons can influence a child’s selective eating, which is often simply a regular aspect of their development. Just as children go through stages of learning in areas such as walking and talking, the development of their food tastes and preferences is also a process. There may be times when they reject certain flavors or textures, which may be due to unique sensory experiences, such as sensitivity to certain flavors or discomfort with some textures. Or maybe they are simply sick or stressed.  I am sure you like comfort foods during those times also.  When I am riding a deadline the last thing I want next to me burning the midnight fuel is a plate of green beans! No, give me popcorn and M&M’s.

Selective eating in children is sometimes related to their desire to exercise control and autonomy. Choosing what they eat may be one of the first ways they express their preferences and make independent decisions. Additionally, some children are naturally more sensitive to flavors and textures, which can lead them to prefer foods with specific characteristics and reject others. This does not necessarily imply an underlying problem but may be part of their process of discovering and adapting to the world of food.

Parents and caregivers should remember that picky eating happens every day in many children and does not necessarily reflect a lack of parenting or approach to eating.

Each child is unique, and their relationship with food can vary considerably. Some may need more time and exposure to get used to certain foods, while others may change their food preferences often. The key is observing, understanding, and supporting each child at their own pace and recognizing that selective eating is often a passing stage in their growth and development. Also keep in mind that eating uses all five senses, it might not be the food they are rejecting, perhaps it is the smell that goes with it they don’t like.

Debunking Common Myths

Some people think a child who does not want to eat certain things is poorly educated or their parents do not know how to set rules for them. Another idea that many people have is that children who are picky eaters will never change and will always eat the same thing. These are not necessarily true. With time, patience, and good strategies, many children begin to try and like a greater variety of foods. It is important not to get discouraged and keep trying with love and patience.

In addition to these myths, there is a belief that picky eaters will always reject healthy foods in favor of less nutritious options. This is not necessarily true either. Selective eating in children is not always linked to a preference for unhealthy foods. Often, it is more of a reaction to the unknown or a preference for familiarity than the nutritional content of the food itself. Parents must understand that, with consistent approaches, attractive food presentation, and the gradual incorporation of new flavors and textures into the diet, children can develop a taste for a wide range of foods, including healthy ones. Patience and creativity in the kitchen and a positive food environment can be vital to transforming children’s food preferences and expanding their palates. Therefore, it is important not to label children as picky eaters quickly and instead focus on constructive, positive methods to encourage a gradual, healthy change in their eating habits. Focus on their overall health, not the food they eat specifically.

Try this!

*Invite your child to the grocery store to help pick one new thing to try.

*Include them in cooking.

*Serve a food more than one way, for example cooked carrots vs. raw.

*Set the rule, try two bites, then you can pass.

*Not a fan of zucchini? No problem, make zucchini bread.

* Offer the food cold or hot, for example oatmeal.

* Let them use their fingers, instead of a fork.