Toddlers, Big Feelings, and the Beautiful Mess of Growth
When my child was a toddler, I felt like I spent half my day picking up couch cushions and toys. I’m partially to blame. We bought about a hundred stuffed animals during the pandemic to bring a little joy back to the world. I would clean them up, turn around, and within minutes, it felt like the room had exploded again. At times, it was mind-numbing.
The toddler years are full of long days on the floor, reading the same book over and over, stacking blocks, and cleaning the same mess. There is real joy in those moments, but the repetition can be challenging. You can spend the day feeling like you are doing a good job, and then suddenly your child is screaming at the top of his lungs because he wanted the blue plate, not the orange one.
There is a reason for this. Toddlers are developing rapidly, especially in emotional regulation, independence, and language. Their big feelings are part of learning how to navigate a world that still feels enormous. At the same time, they are eager to do things on their own. That drive for independence, even when it creates a bigger mess or takes longer, is a critical part of their growth.
This is also when many children experience a language explosion. Almost overnight, they seem to go from a handful of words to full sentences. The everyday routines that feel repetitive to parents, talking, reading, and singing, are exactly what help build communication skills. In our case, our kid’s language development often outpaced his emotional development. Sometimes I had to remind myself I was arguing with a toddler.
Reflecting on those messy toddler days reminds me of the work we are doing now at Parenting Matters. We are just wrapping up our strategic planning process, which helps us keep our eyes on the horizon and think about where we want to go next.
Even with a plan in place, the day-to-day work can still feel a little like those toddler years. I try to keep everything organized, but more often than not, there is a pile of something on the floor or, more realistically, on my desk. Projects, challenges, and the many moving pieces that come with supporting families never stop.
The big things get done. People are supported. Families know they are cared for.
We keep moving forward with the understanding that growth does not always look tidy. Just like toddlers learning and exploring right in front of us, the work we invest in today will continue to blossom and take on a life of its own.
Katie Becker joined Parenting Matters as the Executive Director in May of 2022 after being a long-time supporter and board member. She holds a bachelor’s degree from Ithaca College, and has spent her career in the nonprofit sector, including the YMCA and United Way Suncoast. She has enjoyed honing her skills in fundraising, marketing, and strategic leadership to advance missions close to her heart. She was born and raised in Pennsylvania and has been a Florida resident for fifteen years. In her free time, Katie enjoys spending time with her family and pets, making art, and being active outdoors.